What did the sea say to the shore?
Nothing, it just waved!

Why did the pie cross the road?
To meat'n potato!

What's brown and sticky?
A stick!

What is Santa's favourite pizza?
Deep pan crisp and even!

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!

Who is never hungry at Christmas?
The turkey - he's always stuffed!

What do ducks do at Christmas dinner?
Pull their Christmas quackers!

What do you get if you cross an apple with a Christmas tree?
A pineapple!

Why does Santa have a weed free garden?
Because he likes to hoe hoe hoe!

What do you get if you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frost bite!

Why was Santas little helper depressed?
He had low elf esteem!

What do you call someone who is afraid of Father Christmas?
Claustrophobic!

What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It's Christmas Eve!

What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
Tinselitus!

Who says oh oh oh?
Santa walking backwards!